rewarding bad performance

I have this on my mind today -- how did we get to the point where we reward bad performance? What got me thinking in this direction? Two things - AIG is going to award 500 million dollars in deferred bonuses and compensation to its executives, and our government may have to bailout the big 3 automakers. AIG says the money it's doling out is to keep talented executives on board to bail out the company. It also says the money is not the same money that the government just bailed them out with, but a separate pool of funds. If they had 500 million dollars lying around, why did we have to bail them out? And the executives in question helped screw up the company, so are they really such quality folks that AIG needs to reward them to keep them on board? Bascially they are heaping rewards on folks that screwed up, and screwed up royally.

As to the automakers, I see that we have no choice but to help them out. The US economy is hugely dependent on the businesses downstream and upstream of the auto makers that rely on them being in business, and too many jobs are on the line. I get it. I just don't like it. They have sat on their hands, built cars we didn't want, that didn't meet our needs, often with terrible quality thrown into the mix. And we responded by taking our business to foreign auto makers. And they still didn't respond with better cars, more fuel-efficient cars, more desirable cars. And now they will get bailed out for being bad at business.

I recently did some car shopping on line. I couldn't find a single american auto that met my requirements. Not one. And I wanted to. Not only didn't I find anything, but the deals aren't there either. Toyota is offering 0% financing, on cars that get great gas mileage and have superior ratings. GM is offering employee discounts, high finance rates, and cars with fairly mediocre ratings and so so gas mileage. I'd like to help out the team by buying American, but I can't afford to do it. I just can't take the repair bills, the higher monthly payments and the higher gas bills. So, while our government, and corporate management can afford to reward poor performance, I can't. I have to reward my purchase dollars to the companies that do the best job.

old friends

Yesterday we went to a friend's daughter's bat mitzvah. It was a very nice event, lots of sweet moments. It made me think about the value of old friends. Our host has been a friend of ours since our college days. Her sister was also there, and also a dear old friend from college. Seated at our table was yet another old buddy and his wife (a new buddy).

There is something special about shared history. You have the same reference points. You get the same jokes. We look older, we've all been through many changes over the years. And yet, magically, two seconds after we all get together, we are somehow 20 again. Sweet.

people are weird, part two

According to AP reports, a priest in South Carolina is telling parishioners they must do penance if they voted for Barack Obama. They may not take communion until penance is done, because supporting Obama "constitutes material cooperation with intrinsic evil". This is because Obama is pro-choice.

The priest is the Reverend Jay Scott Newman. His parish is in Greenville, SC. And it seems to me that he is requiring his parishioners to disclose how they voted -- a democratic NO-NO. They will get to do so in the privacy of the confessional, but as a former Catholic, I can tell you that the priest knows the voices of his parishioners and the confessional is not that private.

He is going to deny a sacrament of the Church to people based on how they voted(!!!!) As if the only distinguishing characteristic between Obama and McCain was their position on abortion. Or that the issue of abortion was the only issue that mattered.

It makes me sick.

grown up decisions

Sometimes I hate being a grown-up. Seriously. The day to day stuff doesn't bother me - I enjoy it.

It's the big stuff that gets me down. Should we keep our car? Is it time to trade it in on a new one? Which is better financially? Can we afford it? Can we afford not to do it? Should our son stay in his small private school? or go to the large public city high school? or something in the middle? What's best for him? How much should his opinion weigh in the decision?
Should I try to move into administration? get out of hands-on tech? Take 1 class this semester or two? should we get another dog to keep ours company? how long can we wait to replace the roof? shingle the house?

It's so much easier to focus on the small stuff. What to have for dinner? what to wear to work? do I want a snack? is there time for a nap? which book should I read next?

I think I'll procrastinate for now....

I want my bailout

The financial bailout was designed to purchase troubled assets so that corporations could move forward and resume normal lending and operations. Today, Paulson announced that no troubled assets would be purchased. 350 billion dollars have already been doled out, without spending one cent on its primary purpose. The government has purchased stake in several banks, and "hopes" they will resume normal lending. "HOPES?" Why the f**k wasn't this a stipulation as part of the bailout? Why weren't conditions put on the money?

I feel like we aren't getting good value for our money. And it is OUR money, let's not forget. I feel like sending the government an invoice. If the bailout is not going to be used as intended, I want my share back. In cash. Now.

I think that's fair, don't you?

progress is not a straight line

Progress is not a straight line. I am reminded of this from time to time. We just elected Barack Obama president; a great leap forward for diversity. And Proposition 8 passed in California -- a great step back for diversity. Progress is incremental. We inch forward. Sometimes we cannot even measure the distance we've gone, but still its there. Only when we combine days and years of minute moves do we see the real picture. Go back 150 years. A fraction of a second of world history. And women can't vote. Blacks can't vote. Our kids go to school with their "own kind". We marry our "own kind". No one knows anyone who is gay. Well, the two sweet ladies down the street have been room-mates forever, but.... The progress is real, it's there -- it's just not as fast as we want. We're not where we need to be. But we will get there. Inch forward. Get one person, just one, to understand we have so much more in common than we have differences. Write one letter to an editor. Call one congressman. Vote in one election. Progress is not linear. It's just one. one foot in front of the other, day after day after day. Just ONE.

conquering a bias

I will fess up that I have always been uncomfortable with enormously fat people. I mean really really obese folks. Now, I don't mean that I don't like them, or haven't had fat friends, or anything like that. I mean I have a visceral/aesthetic negative reaction to fat. And I have always been ashamed of by bias, my bigotry in this.

So imagine my surprise last night when I was confronted with a HUUUUGGGGEEEELLLLYYYYY fat person. I was channel surfing and caught the first episode of a show on the Style Network, called Ruby. This is a reality show (I know, yuck!) about a woman named Ruby trying to lose hundreds of pounds. Yes, hundreds. At her heaviest, Ruby weighed over 700 pounds. This woman is gorgeous. Seriously beautiful, despite hovering in the 500 pound range... And she is charming. And fun. And you can't help but want her to succeed. Amd within 15 minutes, I pretty much forgot she was fat.

So maybe I am making progress. If I beat this bias, I only have one real major one left -- ignorant people. But I doubt that's gonna go away anytime soon.

omnivore's hundred

Thanks to http://heardingkittens.blogspot.com/ I have a new list game to play -- omnivore's hundred. Anything I've eaten off the list is in bold. I did okay, but not as well as I would have thought considering what a food addict I am.... and I noticed I hit all the blue-collar/white trash highlights (hostess pies, spam, big macs)

1. Venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos rancheros
4. Steak tartare
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush
11. Calamari
12. Pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. steamed pork buns
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava
30. Bagna cauda
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal
44. Goat’s milk

45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin
64. Currywurst
65. Durian -
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam -
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee
100. Snake

odd convergences

I have noticed that certain dates seem to be what I call "convergence" dates. By that I mean they have some quality that leads them to be attractive to event planners.... November 15th for example. There are about 10,000 things I want to do, all mutually exclusive, and all scheduled for November 15th. We are going to go to a bat mitzvah, and to a high school fair [baltimore city high schools showing what they offer to potential students]. But we are missing a neighborhood workshop, a concert, and a host of other activities in exchange.

We will have weeks with little to do, and then these convergence dates, where we are struggling to decide the relative weights of all the things scheduled for that date....

Perhaps it's that I want to do everything, and that's just not possible. Or that it's part and parcel of city living, because stuff is always going on. I don't know. I just know I hate having to choose, because as soon as I do, I'm missing something....

it's not bursting my bubble

It's not bursting my bubble, at least not yet, but.... Ted Stevens is ahead by 2% in the Alaskan Senatorial race. Yes, Ted Stevens, convicted felon. Ted Stevens, disgraced Senator. They still have to count all the absentee ballots. But he could win. And if he does, guess who gets to appoint his replacement, since he will not be allowed to serve? If you guessed Sarah Palin, in her role as Governor of Alaska, you would win it in 1. Now here's the kicker. She cannot select herself. But she CAN resign, and let her Lieutenant Governor select her as Stevens' replacement. Which would give her a Senate seat, and a shot at gaining 4 years of the experience she was criticized for lacking. UGHH!!

And no, I didn't come up with this scenario myself. Rachel Maddow discussed it on her show, and said the tactic had been used once before -- in 1939.

Yes, WE CAN

The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades

YES, WE CAN and YES, WE DID!!!!!! I woke up this morning, still amazed. Against all odds, Barack Obama is the president-elect of these United States. I just watched his victory speech. I cried. Literally. I was so moved by his words, by his vision, by his inspiration, that I sat at my desk and I cried. I am so proud of our country, so proud of my fellow Americans for ignoring the attacks, the distractions, for choosing hope over fear. And for the first time in a very long time, I feel connected to the process, connected to the other voters.

For years I have felt like an outsider. My values were not the values of our leaders. I was not a "real" American. I was disloyal, unpatriotic, a traitor. Pick a perjorative. I did not think in lock-step with the conservative tide, and so was less a citizen than they were.

But now, I feel a renewed sense of purpose, and a renewed sense of hope. There is unity and peace within our grasp. We really are the United States of America.

dispatches from the REAL America

I just spent some time in the REAL America. To be specific, I spent a few hours in Govans, in line at Govans Elementary School, in Baltimore City, in the state of Maryland. Govans is considerably poorer, and blacker than Sarah Palin's REAL America.

What I found were hundreds of people, patiently waiting in line. It felt like a celebration. People taking photos of the line, asking others to take pictures of themselves in line. A few people got discouraged and tried to leave, but we clapped and shouted encouragement until they got back in line. At one point, an elderly gentleman, who could barely walk stood looking at the line, with a discouraged look on his face. A good samaritan near the head of the line offered the man his spot; he would go to the back of the line in his place. The crowd wouldn't let the good samaratin give up his place, we just said let the older man in line. And that's what happened. No one grumbled, no one said no. We would all wait together.

I made some good friends today (Vernice, Allan and Victor, it was a pleasure!). We talked, laughed, encouraged each other, and shared our hopes for the future. Later, after we voted, we shared hugs and well wishes. Allan took a picture of his ballot in the booth. And he asked the polling judge to take a picture of him voting. She happily did.

They even had certificates of participation for those who wanted to commemorate the event.
So this is the REAL America. Where people were excited to vote, where people were united by a common desire. The REAL America is better than the last 8 years, and it wants the world to know it.

hopes and dreams

I have a lot of hopes and dreams for America.

Perhaps tomorrow, some will begin to come true. I am hoping that we become a nation that other nations can look to as a model for how a country should behave. I hope we respect the Constitution again; civil liberties are not optional, they are fundamental. I hope we learn to use diplomacy instead of war. That the children of America get a first class education, regardless of their parent's education or economic standing. That no one in this country is starving, or homeless, or hopeless. That basic medical care is available to all.

I dream that the American Dream, the idea that each generation can improve on the one before it, is renewed, not just for some Americans, but for ALL Americans.

So today, I wish, I hope, I dream, I pray, that Barack Obama is elected tomorrow. And that this country can regain it's dignity and spirit, so we ALL might move forward together.

sunday routine

I love my Sunday routine. I get up, make my shopping list, go to the grocery store. Once I get home, and everything is put away, I usually do the dishes. Then its laundry time. I do all our laundry for the week on Sunday. I cook my oatmeal for the week, make my tuna salad for lunches, bake a cake or some muffins. I watch football and do my homework. I read the Sunday paper. I cook something time consuming for dinner. Tonight it's roast chicken, string beans, wild and long grain rice and crescent rolls. Yum. This sets us up to use the rest of the chicken in chicken tamale pie, and red beans and rice with chicken.

It's a very full day, but I like the way it's home centered. And I love the feeling of setting up the coming week: clean clothes, lunches, breakfasts.

***********************
this week's oatmeal: steel-cut oats, with cinnamon and raisins. I'll add almonds right before I eat it, so they stay crunchy.

this week's tuna salad: tuna, hard boiled eggs(no yolks), diced pickle, celery, green pepper, shredded carrot, mustard, mayo

dinners this week: roasted chicken with rice and string beans, chicken tamale pie, red beans and rice with chicken, baked ziti with turkey sausage, carryout pizza

getting down to the wire

The election is getting down to the wire. We have less than a week to go. I am nervous about the outcome. I think it's because I'm a Democrat, and so I am used to imploding at the last second. The October Surprise, the fatal mistake, the horrid photo op. Whatever. I care too much about the outcome this time to be complacent.

Please make lots of time in your schedule to vote on Tuesday. I have taken a 1/2 day of precious vacation time, just to make sure I can vote. Don't think your guy is so far ahead that your one vote won't matter. The size of the victory also matters a great deal in the ability of the next president to push his agenda.

There is also the spectre of miscounting, dirty tricks, etc. By showing up, creating a crowd as witness, we might avoid some of the worst violations of election laws. And the dirty tricks are already showing up: A flyer has been distributed in Hampton Roads, VA telling people that because of the overwhelming turnout expected, they are asking people to split voting days -- so Republicans should vote on Nov 4 and Democrats should vote on November 5th (!!!) This kind of crap worries me. The flyer looked official, and really could fool some potential voters.


VOTE!!! and maybe hang around with your cell phone outside the polling place for a while, make sure nothing sleazy is happening in the process....

changing the way I shop

I am a recent convert to coupons. Never used them before, as my time is too important to waste for a few cents, etc. But while I was home on sick leave, I watched a woman on Oprah, a lady called the Coupon Mom, get over $200 worth of groceries for $37. She wasn't smarter than me, she didn't spend hundreds of hours to get the deals, but she had a system that works. I went to her website Coupon Mom, read her e-book about her system, and signed up. I have reduced my grocery bill by over 25% and it takes me 15 minutes a week. I know I sound like one of those cheesy infomercials, but seriously... It doesn't cost anything, and it is mostly common-sense. It just never occurred to me to put any serious thinking into grocery shopping. It's just something you do, right? Another damn chore on the list.

It isn't just coupons... it is timing. Planning menus and buying based on what is on sale, and then using coupons to further reduce the cost. The coupon mom website is tied into local sales circulars (in our area its giant food), so you can generate your grocery list from the database, and then she tells you what coupons have come out that match your list. Really quick and easy.

I normally spent $180- $200 a week at the grocery store. Since I started this system, I spend about $120-$130. We have had no decease in the quality of our meals, or in the healthiness of what I make. It takes me an extra 15 minutes a week to use the coupon mom system, and then the normal meal planning time I take deciding what I'm gonna cook for the coming week. Then I do my grocery list. Saving $50-$60 a week is not enormous, but it does help offset the increase in our heating oil bill, and in our tax escrow bills.

red carpet moment

Today we went to the Senator Theater for a very special premiere. The Steve Yeager's Young Filmmakers Workshop was showing a number of short films, 5 documentaries, and the feature presentation "Obscured by the Night". Our son did graphic design work, and green screen editing for the feature film. So today, he got a limo ride, a short walk on an even shorter red carpet, and a chance to see his work on the big screen. And at the Senator, that's a really really big screen. It was kind of a charge to see his name in the credits. And it was a bigger rush to see people buying the film poster he made. He doesn't want to pursue film work -- he's totally dedicated to video game design -- but it was a nice experience anyway.

I could have been Sarah Palin

I realized yesterday that I could have been Sarah Palin. If it weren't for a certain intellectual curiosity, a voracious reading habit and some education, I could have been just like Sarah.

It's a blue collar story, I think. Until I was ten, we lived in a solidly lower middle class (veering to lower class) neighborhood. Girls wanted to be majorettes and mommies. Boys wanted to play baseball and then maybe do construction or join the army. Scouting was pretty big. All the men, except my dad, hunted during deer season. Getting a BB gun was a rite of passage. Everyone went to church on Sunday.

And certain values were instilled early. Take anything that's free. Don't get caught. If you get knocked up, get married. Don't be too uppity, don't be too smart.

It's the recent news stories about the $150,000 campaign wardrobe, and billing Alaska for taking the kids on official state business that got me thinking about the values, the lifetstyle I grew up with. Because to my adult eyes, what Sarah did was WRONG. On so many levels. But in the culture I grew up on, it would be, of course you would do that. What idiot wouldn't run the bill to the max when someone else was paying? If they said go get some decent clothes, and they told you to get what you wanted, what girl wouldn't spend $150,000? If you could wiggle the rules and get five nights in a hotel instead of 1, why wouldn't you? If you could say drawing a raffle ticket was state business, and get to bring your kids along at taxpayer expense, well, why not? It's the same culture that views slipping on a store floor as akin to winning the lottery. Cheating is fine, if you don't get caught. And it's not stealing if it's taking from the gubbamint -- hell, it's all your money, innit?

So you see, I could have been this woman. Really I could. Luckily for me, fate intervened, and I learned to read.

class warfare?

Apparently, people who make more than $250,000 per year do not consider themselves to be wealthy, despite being in the top 2% of all income brackets. A writer for the Baltimore Sun received many irate emails after a column discussing Barack Obama's tax plan, which would increase taxes only for this top 2% of earners. Mostly, the complaints were of the "by the time I pay the mortgage, 3 kids private school tuitions, etc, $250,000 is not wealthy" school of thought. I think the complainers missed the point. Private school tuitions are a luxury. A large house with an equally large mortgage, ditto. The fact that you spend everything you make does not mean you aren't wealthy. 98% of american families make less; some much much less. If you make $250,000 a year, you are indeed fortunate. That you might be taxed on your good fortune seems to anger many in that bracket. I don't get it. The phrase "you can't get blood from a stone" seems to come to mind. Who is going to pay taxes? People who have no money for food or shelter? People in bankruptcy? People making minimum wage? The money has to come from somewhere. Consider your taxes "civic karma". In this case, the tax burden is not equal. But it is fair.

Bravo, Christopher Buckley!

Christopher Buckley, son of William F Buckley, endorsed Obama the other day. He was promptly allowed to resign from the highly conservative National Review (which his father founded). He has also received thousands of hate letters from conservatives for his "betrayal" of the conservative movement, and his betrayal of John McCain. At the beginning of the campaign, Buckley had endorsed McCain, a friend since 1982.

But he found over the last few months a changed McCain. One who had let his defeat in 2000 change him profoundly. He found an angry man, willing to betray all principles to get elected. He questioned the judgement of a man who would select Sarah Palin as his running mate.

His endorsement came via The Daily Beast, not The National Review. He didn't feel it was appropriate to use a conservative forum to make his endorsement. In the end, it didn't matter. His principled stand still cost him his job as the back page writer for the magazine. BTW, he says it's not that he left the conservatives -- its that they left him. The last 8 years reflect no true conservativism; just poor judgement, a lack of ethics, and a willingness to suspend the constitution.

So, from the bottom of my heart, BRAVO!!!

On Poverty

There is enough for all. There really is. But only when you look at "all there is" from a global perspective. Where there is a shortage of something in one place, there is an abundance in another. Only when we truly see ourselves as one world will we ever really tackle the problem of poverty. When our consciences will no longer allow a child to starve to death while we have 3 cars in the driveway, when we can't abide people sleeping under a piece of cardboard while we decide where to vacation this year, when the idea of anyone making ten million a year disgusts us, while others slave away to make a dollar a day, then we will see poverty disappear.

If we are willing to get by on a little less, so that others can have a little more, then we can make poverty disappear. It's not a huge thing. At the end of the month, I have no money left. But when I really look at it, another ten dollars here or there, diverted to charity, would make no difference to me, and the world to someone who needs it. I am not wealthy. I can't change the world. But I can do my part, and so can you. Skip a pizza once in a while, and give the money to the foodbank. Take coffee from home instead of buying it at Starbuck's and give the difference to Modest Needs. Rent one less movie a month. It's all small stuff. But if everyone who could do it, would do it, we can make poverty disappear.

always look on the bright side

I had my gallbladder surgery. I feel tons better. I lost 14 pounds while I was sick, which puts me within 4 pounds of my goal weight for weightwatchers. I didn't do it the way I had planned, slowly over a year and a half, but it does put me on the right path. I had to use up my sick leave, but my elbow feels better as a side benefit. I spent way too much time watching daytime TV, but I also learned how to use coupons effectively to trim my grocery bill.

I missed two classes, but so did a lot of other folks. I had time, so I finally replaced my bifocals, and can now see clearly for the first time in months. I feel less stressed out, more rested and my mood is improving by leaps and bounds.

so, always look on the bright side of life... (with a nod to Monty Python of course)

an eye opening week

This week has been an eye opener for me, on a lot of different fronts. I discovered that I can get more work done in much less time when I work at home. While I missed the social aspects of being at the office (I really do enjoy my co-workers), I could get all my work done in half the time at home.

I discovered I loved the pace. I had time to take our son to school, come home, have breakfast, work a few hours, eat lunch, play out back with the dog, work a few more hours, go pick up my son in car-line (meaning no after-care for him), come home, work another hour or two, cook an early dinner. I felt relaxed, less clock-bound, even though I really was as "on the clock" as I am at the office.

Our son loved the week. He had a much shorter day, since he came home at 3:15pm instead of 5:30pm. I wasn't as tired so I was in a better mood when I picked him up.

A lot of my stress comes from the perception of control. When I perceive my time is not my own, I feel stressed. When my financial issues seem insurmountable, I feel stressed. I am happy, calm, relaxed, when I have the illusion of running my own ship, steering my own course.

So, clearly, for me the best of all possible lifes is one where I can make my own time decisions. I have to get my finances in order, not so that I can become wealthy, but so I can have the freedom to control my time.

PI**ED OFF

OK, now I'm pissed. Apparently Palin has been sent out with instructions to launch personal attacks on Barack Obama. She says he "pals around with terrorists", that he doesn't feel about America like we do. The terrorist, William Ayers, was one of the founders of the Weather Underground, in the 60s. When Obama was a small child. His association now? They were on some neighborhood committees together. They are neighbors. Their kids go to the same school. WOW. Maybe Ayers will sue for libel.

This is getting ugly. McCain has a long history of bad behavior, which to date, Obama has classily ignored. If they keep attacking him, he is going to have to attack back, and we all lose by it. McCain is desperate, and therefore dangerous. And Palin seems to enjoy her role as the "barracuda". It's only a matter of time until the womanizing, the Keating 5, the loss of 5 planes, etc gets splashed on every newspaper. And then we will be back to the racial slurs, the "hussein" cracks, and the un-american rumors swirl again. The country really doesn't need to be more divided as we lead up to this election; it really doesn't.

Everybody take a few deep breaths. Remember who we are, and what we really want. Hell, read the golden rule a few times if it helps. And please, let's not go down this path.

post op update

I had my surgery on Monday, and was home on Tuesday morning. The surgery went well, and I should be feeling much better in a few weeks. My diet is already much much better. As of today, all restrictions were lifted. I had cereal with skim milk this morning, and I had a sandwich (with mayo on it) for lunch. Oh boy!! Honestly, a simple sandwich was like heaven. And I had instant mac and cheese for dinner last night. Sublime.

The only troubling thing is my reaction to the CO2... for those who don't know, when you have a laparascopy, they pump up your abdominal cavity like a balloon, filling it with CO2. This makes it easier for the surgeons to move around. Unfortunately, it causes hideous pain post-op for some people, in the form of shoulder pain. My shoulders hurt 10 times more than my tummy (which has several holes in it). I also look like I'm 4 months pregnant. Once this lovely side affect is gone, I should feel tremendously better.

I took all of this week off from work (!) and am going to work from home next week, as much as I am able... The week after that is our big migration to Outlook 2007 and Office 2007, and I absolutely have to be back at work to handle this.

The BEST thing about this whole process has been the warm wishes, the cards, the calls, the flowers, just the general concern from friends, family and co-workers. I'm very lucky to have so many warm and wonderful folks in my life, and this week has been a terrific reminder of that.

true blood

I am a huge fan of Charlaine Harris' Southern Vampire series. I have been waiting eagerly for the HBO series, ever since it was announced as a project. I even signed up for HBO on Demand, just so I could watch the show. I have now seen the first 3 episodes, and I *love* it. It isn't a 100% repeat of the books, but it is really really close.

At first, I was really disappointed with the casting. How could little Anna Paquin play Sookie Stackhouse? But she does a great job, and now I think they couldn't have picked anyone better for the role.

My only disappointment is that I can't watch these with our son -- way way too much very explicit sex. It really borders on soft porn. Good soft porn, mind you, but still... not watchable with the kid. Which is a bummer. I try to watch when he is otherwise engaged, just so I don't have to make a big deal of turning it off when he comes into the room [yes, it is that explicit].

The other bummer is that, because I watch through HBO on Demand, I can't see an episode until AFTER it airs on HBO. So the show is on Sundays at 9, and I can't watch until at least Sunday at 10pm. Usually I end up watching the following Saturday afternoon.

It's worth it though. I am curious as to whether folks who haven't read the books would like it as much, but for me its a kick to see them come to life. So to speak.

cynical SOB

McCain is one cynical SOB. Seriously. I thought his Palin pick was a cynical, manipulative move. But the latest -- let's suspend campaigning so I can go solve the financial crisis -- now that's CYNICAL. Does he really think folks will buy it? That his single voice is needed so badly in Congress, that he alone can pull people together, that he can't spare a couple of hours to debate?? WTF?? He doesn't have the answers, and he has shown he has no ability to build consensus. Hell, his own party doesn't even love him. WOW!!!

And he looked like the cat who ate the canary when announcing it. I could just see him thinking "checkmate" over his latest move. What a SOB!! There was a time, a few years ago, when I thought he wasn't so bad. He was a moderate, and one of the few voices in the Republican party to be in favor of abortion. Now, he is a panderer. No positions to speak of. He'd sell his mother to get in office.

How do people not see through this??

no more blank checks

The new mantra - NO MORE BLANK CHECKS!! After 9/11, the administration was given sweeping, undefined powers. This led to chaos, war in Iraq, the loss of civil rights, torture and a huge deficit. Now the administration is asking for more sweeping powers, this time over our financial institutions. NO MORE BLANK CHECKS!! I can only imagine, and shudder at the image, of Bush and Cheney and the other little bushies running amok on Wall Street. Rewarding their friends (remember Halliburton?), and punishing their enemies. They can do a tremendous amount of damage between now and January 20th. And the system is too frail to survive it.

I would rather see Wall Street take a beating, and the Dow drop to 9,000 than I would to see Bush and Cheney with free rein. Yes, I know that is harsh and a lot of people will suffer. But truthfully, if we fund a trillion dollars without oversight of any kind, a lot of people will suffer and maybe nothing will get fixed.

Washington helped create this mess, with the Bush doctrine of "hands off". Let companies do what's best for themselves and our economy will prosper, and the individual will benefit with more jobs, better jobs, etc. Yeah, right. That worked so well. Let's do more of that. Give them big checks, and let them sort it out. They'll do what's in our best interests.

NO MORE BLANK CHECKS!!!

my diet

The doctor asked me today how I was managing on my ultra low fat diet. She was amazed at how low I had gotten it. So what am I eating?

for breakfast: steel-cut oats cooked with dried berries. I make a batch on Sunday and it lasts through the work week. On the weekends, special K or rice krispies with fat-free milk.

lunch: fat-free soup (split pea, veggie, lentil), an apple or a peach, water

dinner: it varies. I have been eating egg-beater omelettes with veggies, more fat-free soup, toasted whole wheat pitas (also fat free). I've tried whole wheat, low fat pasta with canned fat free sauce, but its not very good. I've also tried salads with honey and balsamic vinegar, which isn't bad, and I've been eating a lot of fresh tomatoes.

evening snack: fruit, prunes, I tried making fat-free home made popcorn, but it was vile. I just made a batch of fat free no pudge brownies, and I can have those.

What's missing: dairy, meat, protein, healthy fat. I also had to cut back on beans, since I'm having GI issues anyway.

I have stopped dropping weight (I think). I've lost 8 pounds in two weeks, but my activity level has now dropped to almost nothing so I think that's gonna stop completely.

It's been interesting, and has shown me how dependent I am on foods for my mood, my social activity, my relaxation.

go ravens!!

Yesterday was a great day for football. Watching, not playing. I felt like crap, had a ton of laundry to do, homework, etc. So a day on the couch watching, not 1 game, but 2, was a complete joy. Adding to it was that my team WON, and won pretty for a change (when they manage to win, they usually win ugly).

The Ravens are not a great football team. But yesterday they looked pretty damn good. I know it may all disappear next Monday, when they have to play the Steelers, but for now, I'm gonna savor the win.

talking out of both sides of his mouth

McCain is now contradicting himself daily. "The fundamentals of the economy are sound." And the next day -- "I meant the american worker, the small business owner, in the sense that those are our fundamentals, those are sound." Hmmmm. I can't think that anyone believes that 2nd statement/clarification. The day after that - "If I were president, I would fire him [the SEC chairman]"

McCain is on the record as being opposed to government regulation of business and industry. So he wants to write tighter regulatory rules.... and fire the chair of the SEC for not interfering more. I mean he says that now, now that he is running for office and there is a financial crisis.

This guy is frightening. Even for a politician... and I assume a certain level of bad behaviour out of folks running for office. They do need to appease the electorate enough to get into office. But come on -- this is just too too much.

on the home front

I have scheduled my gallbladder surgery for Sept 29th. It is outpatient surgery, but they are going to keep me overnight, because of my known propensity for up-chucking after anaethesia. Right now, I am on antibiotics. Hopefully this will make me feel a bit better in the next couple of days.

I have been a total bitch for a week now. I blame the diet. The ER doctor put me on a NO-FAT diet. Not low fat. NO FAT. This is nearly impossible. I have tried to keep below 3 grams per day, since 0 is out of the question. I mostly eat fat free soup, fruit, veggies and no fat, whole wheat pita bread. It is miserable. I had toyed with the idea of becoming a vegetarian before this, and I still might, but right now - I miss meat. I realize I might not if I was able to have nuts, soy products, olives, things like that. But as it stands right now, I would almost kill for a steak. Or a piece of fried chicken. I was in an elevator yesterday with a woman holding a steak sub, and another with a plate of fries. Niether woman knows how close she came to being mugged for her food. The smells were making me drool.

I also seem to have no energy at all. I don't know if it is caused by the severe drop in calories, the lack of protein, an iron-poor diet, or just being ill. I do know that I don't even like taking the long walk down the hall to the bathrooms. And I haven't taken my lunch-time walk in over a week.

On the plus side, sort of -- I have lost 8 pounds on the diet from hell.

Anybody want to go out for diner food when this is all over???

high fud factor

The news today has a HIGH FUD FACTOR. With Lehman Bros bankrupt, Merrill Lynch sold, and AIG teetering on the brink of collapse, the DOW dropped over 500 points yesterday. I am, frankly, frightened. For various reasons, I am not in the financial shape to weather serious economic hard times. We have some money put away, but not enough. And our retirement accounts are taking a beating. Expenses are way up, and our income is stagnant. Companies are not handing out raises like they have in the past.

It worries me. And I am one of the lucky ones. We have great jobs, we have a home we can afford. But will we EVER be able to retire?

getting results

A co-worker asked me the other day what I was doing to see that Obama get elected. The polls indicate a scarily close race. So he had a point - if I care about the end result, what am I doing to make it happen? So far, I have sent 3 checks to Obama's campaign. None were large, but they were what we could afford. I blog here, obviously, but to a very very tiny audience. I talk with my undecided co-workers, probably much more than politeness allows. I've got a bumper-sticker on my car, a button on my backpack.

So what else? What do you all think works? How can we, as not very wealthy, not well-connected individuals, get the results we want out of this election?

These are not rhetorical questions, gang. seriously, what can we do?

what are they hiding?

What are the republicans hiding? Sarah Palin has not yet been allowed to talk with the media. Not one interview. No questions allowed. The reporters on her plane have been told that the flights are entirely off the record. Her first solo appearance -- Alaska, tomorrow at a welcome home rally.

WTF? Is she a candidate or a prop? If she is running, take the bridle off and let her run. Or are they afraid of her answers? afraid of what she might say if she is unscripted?

In addition to trooper-gate, she is now also being looked at for her expenses as governor. Apparently, Ms Palin has claimed 43,000 dollars for travel expenses for this year. She takes her family on all official travel, and wants Alaska taxpayers to foot the bill. Because she is a fiscal conservative.
Hmmmmmmm......

too much information

Sometimes I think we live in an age of too much information. I spent a little time googling treatment for gallstones, to get more diet advice. What I found was the typical profile of the gallstone patient -- what doctors call the 4 Fs.
Fat, Forties, Female and Fertile. If I hadn't already felt like puking, this would have put me over the edge.

This is knowledge I could have lived without. And it smacks of a certain insensitivity on the part of physicians. It's not a bad mnemonic, but could they have been a little more understanding? In the days before the internet, this would have been private knowledge, shared just between MDs. But now, with wikipedia and webmd and google, its all right out there for the general public.

So I'm 4F... UGH!!!

better today

The sun is shining. The Ravens won a football game. My pain meds are working. I slept through the night and took a nap. My home office is usable again. The filing is done. The first episode of True Blood is on HBO on Demand, so I can watch during lunch.

I miss my sweetie, who is on a business trip. But other than that, everything just seems better today.

timing really is everything

Timing really is everything. Tomorrow my husband has to leave for Rochester, NY for a 3 day business trip. My semester starts tomorrow night. So, of course, I spent most of the day in the emergency room. I got sick last night, tummy pains waking me up around 11pm. I never went back to sleep. I thought I had food poisoning, with very similar symptoms. But at 5:30 this morning, I threw in the towel and called our HMO. They told me to come in at 10am. I went in, they poked around a few minutes, then told me they thought it was my gallbladder. Since it was Sunday, they wanted me to get tested at a local emergency room. They were going to give me pain meds, and didn't want me driving so they called an ambulance to transport me. In the meantime, they couldn't get the prescription through in their computer system. So I ended up riding in an ambulance without the pain meds. My husband had to waylay a neighbor to take him to get our car, then waylay another neighbor to bring him and our son to the emergency room.

Nothing goes quickly at an ER. I was there for 3 hours. I did get a sonagram that found a few gallstones, which was the reason for the food poisoning-like symptoms. I got prescription meds, and a recommendation that I schedule surgery.

The kicker, at least for me, is that I also got a recommendation to lose weight and cut out fat from my diet. I'm already on a low fat diet! I eat french fries like once a year. But until the surgery, no fats. No cheese, no avocados, no butter, no fried foods. If that isn't motivation to get it done soon, I don't know what is.

Hopefully I won't miss class tomorrow night. I already took the day off from work, so I can sleep. And a dear friend is taking my husband to the train station so I don't have to get up at 4:30am....

the election in a nutshell

I was going to skip talking about the election for awhile, but I can't seem to help myself. Yesterday, I watched the news. An entire room full of people chanting "DRILL, BABY, DRILL" seems to sum up the whole election in a nutshell.

All I can think is that these people are from some alternate dimension, one where there is no pollution, no global warming, and no finite resources. Otherwise, how could anyone, and I mean ANYONE, see this as a successful mantra?

Between that and Cindy McCain's $310,000 convention ensemble (just one outfit, mind you) really illustrates for me that these folks JUST DON'T GET IT. They don't get that people are suffering under a decaying economy. They don't get that the entire world is imperiled by global warming. They don't get that cutting taxes never gives you more money to spend. They don't get that we can't WIN the war in Iraq -- it was lost before we even started.

The 50s are OVER!!! Read a newspaper. Take some classes. Get your head out of your ass. America has to become part of the rest of the world.

little victories

Life is sometimes about the little victories. For the last week, my son has gotten himself up with an alarm clock, packed his own lunch for school, and done his own homework, with no prodding, and no reminders. As someone who has had to get him ready, get me ready, pack two sets of lunches, worry about two breakfasts, nagged about homework while struggling with my own, this is VICTORY. And it is sweet!

I am free from the tyranny of breakfast. Free from the tyranny of lunch. I can move, somnolent, through my morning, speaking little, thinking less.

This is VICTORY, and it is sweet!

family values

To me, family values include doing what's best for your child. Sometimes this means sacrificing your own goals and ambitions. This is why I cannot understand Sarah Palin. Why would this woman agree to run? Her 17 year old daughter is pregnant, due to give birth in December. Sarah Palin will be out campaigning through November, and were she successful, would be taking office in January. Where she will not be, is home helping her daughter navigate a critical time in her young life.

And because of her political ambitions, her daughter will have to go through all of this while the whole world watches her. What kind of parent would put their child through something like that? How could she?

She is running as a family-values candidate. Evangelical, anti-abortion, pro-creationist, favoring abstinence education.

She needs to get her priorities in the right place. In a choice between personal ambition and the needs of your children -- the kids come first!!!

any woman will do?

Apparently McCain's new slogan is Any Woman Will Do, else how do we explain the addition of Sarah Palin to the rebublican ticket? I want a woman in the White House, but not this badly. Sarah Palin was in the PTA. Then she was mayor of a town of 6,000 people. Now she is Governor of a sparsley populated state, and is under investigation for her conduct in office. What a sparkling resume! Clearly she is ready to lead the free world.

She does have appeal to the evangelical base. She has the gun-nuts in her corner as well. But. She. Is. Not.Qualified. Not for higher office. She may be a very nice woman. She may be a great governor. But as Vice President to an old and not particularly healthy President -- nope, not a good idea.

I also found the choice to be, shall we say, CYNICAL. Let's put a woman on the ticket and all the Hillary supporters will flock to vote for her. As if we can't tell the difference between Hillary Clinton and Sarah Palin. I feel pandered to, and it's not nice.

So there you have it, Reason 734 for not voting for McCain -- he subscribes to the AWWD philosophy.

historic moment

I watched Barak Obama's acceptance speech last night. I encouraged my son to watch as well. Because, whether you are a Democrat, a Republican or an Independent, last night was history unfolding. A watershed moment in the story of America. An African-American man, accepting his party's nomination for the highest office in the country!

We have come far, but there is a long way to go. It needs to not be a wish, but a truth, when a parent tells their child -- yes baby, you can grow up and be President. It needs to be true when that child is a girl, is disabled, is poor, is gay, is muslim, is jewish. When we can't see an impediment, but only possiblity, we will have truly arrived.

let's hear it for hillary

Let's hear it for Hillary. Her historic motion on the floor of the DNC, where she made the motion to nominate Barack Obama by acclamation, was a classy move. She did not get what she wanted out of this race, but she took what she was dealt and handled everything with dignity, grace and courage. Far better in defeat, Hillary rose to the occasion and earned her place in the history books.

The cynical might say she was saving her own political future, but I think she was sincere. If she can't be the one in office, she really will do everything to see that the next best choice (in her eyes) does win. I think Hillary cares deeply about the future of America. And she really is fearful of what a McCain presidency could bring. Four more years to drive the economy down, increase the gap between rich and poor, and lower our stature in the world even further.

I hope that people heard the words this week, and took them to heart. No how, no way, no McCain!

Proud to be a Democrat!

Last night I watched the very moving tribute to Teddy Kennedy, and this morning I was able to finally see Michelle Obama's speech from the DNC. I am so very very proud to be a Democrat today. Kennedy' accomplishments outweigh his personal issues by a large margin. He has been a force for positive change in this world, and he should be proud of what he has managed to achieve.

And Michelle Obama? What an incredible woman. She is educated, articulate, poised, accomplished. I think she hit a home run with her speech last night. She humanized the candidate, and gave us a window into their lives.

The Dream does live on!

politics as usual

I am disappointed. I thought that with Obama and McCain running, we would have a relatively clean campaign. More focused on the issues, less on personalities. No smears or swift-boating.

I was wrong. It looks like the next few months will be nasty as hell, as we gear up for November elections. It bothers me, mostly because I care a great deal about the outcome. I want Obama to win. I really truly do. I don't just think he would be a better president than McCain -- I think he would be a great president. I admire him. I think he's the right man for our time.

And so it bugs me when there are personal attacks on him. I don't want his patriotism constantly in question. Nor would I care if he was a Muslim. When did being Muslim become a bad thing, anyway? How insulting is that to Americans who are Muslim that it is used almost as a swear word in politics? and why all the attacks on Michelle Obama? is it because she is educated? successful? good-looking? loves her husband and children? WTF?? We'd be lucky to have her in the White House, in any capacity.

So, I hope people will weed out the facts from the fiction, the truth buried in the mire... so we can get the President we should have, and not the one we deserve.

26 YEARS!!!

Today is our 26th anniversary. On August 14, 1982, my husband and I got married. We were young, stupid, a little scared, and terribly terribly lucky. We somehow got it right, despite all the odds against us. And it just gets better every year.

maybe I shouldn't read about food

I am about a third of the way through The Omnivore's Dilemma. I've read enough of it to know it will be an infuence on me. I should explain that when I was 8 I read The Jungle and didn't eat hot dogs for over 12 years as a result. A few years ago, I read Fast Food Nation, and you guessed it, have virtually given up fast food. I say virtually, because there are times when the universe conspires to make sure that's absolutely all that's available to you.

Books still have that power, that with the right alchemical combination of words, they can change you. I don't think it's a bad thing, mind you. I probably needed to ditch hot dogs and fast food.

Sometimes, though, there are unintended consequences. I had a hard time eating an ear of corn the other day. It somehow had taken on an evil tinge for me. A beautiful, fresh ear from the farmer's market... and then I slapped some butter on the sucker and took out my revenge for it ruining the planet.

the pot and the kettle

George Bush admonished China yesterday about its lack of freedoms, and its treatment of political dissidents. WTF???? Did the man forget Guantanomo Bay? Mister Secret Wiretaps is telling other countries to loosen up?

China has a repressive government, and it does need to move forward with more rights for its citizens. I just thing George Bush has absolutely NO CREDIBILITY WHATSOEVER when addressing these issues. And the world does not love hypocrites... I'm sure his comments will play really really well in the middle east.

And it will be interesting to see how he is received at the opening ceremonies of the Olympic games, after insulting his hosts.

a new leaf -- again

We are back from Boston (and Cambridge). We had a good week. Lots of interesting stuff at the Web 2.0 conference, a good visit with friends, and the man-child had a wonderful time being independent and all grown-up at camp.

Now we are back to reality. It should be interesting. Back on the exercise and diet wagon. And on a budget, seriously. We suck at this, but I think we are motivated enough this time to make it work.

I'm back to making menus for the week. It keeps us eating fairly well, and cuts our food budget significantly. This week the menu is pork with many flavoured sauce (stir fry pork with broccoli and tofu in a brown sauce), chicken with red beans and rice, chili cheese dogs (low cal version with turkey chili, lowfat cheese, lowfat dogs for me), chicken fajitas, and fish and scallop chowder (fat free milk, flour and creamed corn make the soup base instead of heavy cream, butter and flour).

I've got low fat tuna salad on 9 grain bread, cherries, and weightwatchers cheese for lunches... the tuna salad is pretty good: tuna packed in water, finely grated carrot, celery, finely chopped green pepper, chopped dill pickle, hard boiled egg, soy mayo and yellow mustard. Ends up being about a third veggies.

and breakfast is either kashi go lean with almonds and banana, or oatmeal with blueberries and almonds.

Exercise is walking this week, and then wii fit added to the mix next week, and hopefully some core work the week after. I want to get the exercise routine firmly established before school starts in September.

Wish me luck!

big week coming up

We have a big week coming up at my house, or rather, NOT at my house. Our son goes to sleep away camp for the first time. He is spending a week in the dorms at Harvard, attending the New York Film Academy. He's going to be learning the basics of digital film-making. He is accompanied by his two best friends. One friend's parents are driving the boys up to camp, and my husband and I are picking them up and bringing them home.

I'm going to a conference in Boston on web 2.0 for higher ed. So we will be about half an hour away from our son. Work will pay for our hotel and travel, so it works out nicely. I'm looking forward to the conference. I haven't attended anything in my field in years. I did speak at one conference last year, but I only went for my talk, and left afterwards.

We love Boston, so my husband will find plenty to do while I am attending my sessions, and we'll have some time to wander around together in the evenings and on Thursday. Friday we are going to get together with old friends who live nearby. It will be great to catch up with them and hang out a bit.

Any travel is good. And a break from routine is even better!

things I've learned

I am 46 today. As is usual on my birthday, I try to take a little time for self-reflection.

So, in no particular order, here are some things I've learned in 46 years:

if it sounds too good to be true, it is
never try to fill an inside straight
condoms leak
never go to bed with someone you don't want to wake up with
good friends are essential
if you have to choose between head and heart, go with heart
timing is everything
luck is everything else
everybody needs to feel valuable
everyone has a story -- and they are all interesting
don't walk barefoot on hot pavement
you have to like yourself or no one else will be able to
men have an entirely different definition of FAT
laziness can hurt you
procrastination almost always works in your favor
be careful when you put on suntan lotion to not miss a spot
let your bait sit a minute so the fish can get to it
the error you don't check for is the one most likely to occur
some prices are too much to pay
sometimes you can't afford to save that much
playing the lottery is like throwing dollar bills in the trashcan, but more fun
education is always worth it
don't cook barefoot
the smoke always blows in your direction
you can be wearing too much perfume
laughter is the best medicine
it only hurts the first time someone calls you ma'am
change your oil
eat your vegetables
keep track of your keys

the world is amazing, stop and appreciate it

Batman

Go see The Dark Knight. Go see it twice. Don't wait for video. See it in the theater with a great big crowd of people, at night. Definitely at night.

Heath Ledger has created the ultimate Joker. No one could do it better. Ever. I don't see how anyone could even try...

14!

WOW. 14 years ago, I had a baby boy. That single day event changed my life forever. And I can't tell you how glad that makes me.

Our son is a good kid, and he is becoming a good man. This summer has been an amazing burst of development for him. He is getting himself to day camp at a nearby university, by taking an MTA bus. He voluntarily got a haircut, told me when he needed new shoes, is helping me carry stuff so I don't stress my elbow, is making polite conversation when necessary, and in general is just more responsible. We can hang out together now, and actually enjoy each other's company.

He's taught me a lot: more patience, taking my time over things, stressing less about the little things, that time passes much faster than you can possibly realize, that the people around you need more than your presence, they need your participation, to give to the needy, respect the differences in how people's minds work, that people can surpise you. That you can love way more than you thought you could. That you can worry more than you thought you could. And that you can enjoy the detours way more than you thought you could.

Happy Birthday, little one.

lightning fast response to crisis

Let's hear it for the G-8. In response to a world in crisis, they have agreed to halve greenhouse emissions...by 2050! WOW!! Over 40 years from today. Do they really think you could call this a goal? 40 years is more like someday, or when I get around to it, or eventually. It surely isn't a "we've got to do something, and quickly" type response. Do they think that food shortages and water shortages and catastrophic weather are going to get better over that time period?

In 40 years, I could have water-front property --without moving. I could finally have that summer place in the tropics that I've always dreamed about, right here in Maryland. I could have grandchildren who have never seen a tree, or been outside in the daytime, or breathed pure air.

World leaders? I don't think so.

surrounding myself with good people

This weekend was mostly devoted to social stuff. We went to a neighbor's party on the 4th of July, and then hosted our own cookout on the 5th.

While I have done many stupid or short-sighted things in my life, I have done one thing well. I have surrounded myself with good people. The people I've picked to be in my life are there because they ADD to my life. I am immensely richer for their friendship. The people life has placed in my path -- my neighbors, my co-workers, my relatives by marriage -- are wonderful.

Now I have to find a way to make more time for all of them. That is my biggest struggle these days. To carve out enough time to just hang out with the people I care about. What I get out of it is so huge, though, that I know I'll find a way.

trying to do the right thing

As many of you know, I am waiting, not so patiently, for a SmartCar. I have a reservation on the waiting list. I paid my $99 for my slot on the list. And. I just got my "delivery date" estimate. Now this is only an estimate, I am told. I could get the car sooner, or later. My date is

October 2009 to December 2009

No, not a typo, believe me. Because I couldn't believe it either. So I asked the company if this was a mistake. They said no. It really would be more than 18 MORE MONTHS to get the damn car.

You know, I am trying, really trying, to do the right thing. I want an environmentally sound car for commuting. One that I can afford. One that doesn't cost an arm and a leg and another leg. And doesn't have huge environmental disposal issues, like the hybrids do with their batteries.

Why is this so freaking difficult? How did we get to the point where a small, inexpensive, fuel-efficient vehicle is like the holy f*ing grail?

court has clause trouble

The Supreme Court apparently has clause trouble. Seems the whole militia clause was ignored in today's ruling about individual rights to handguns. The Constitution guaranteed our right to have guns to serve in a militia, not to an absolute right to handguns. The DC ban on handguns has been struck down, even though handguns have no purpose in a militia and no purpose in a home other than killing folks. With something easily concealable.

If you want to defend your property, buy a shotgun. Handguns are an abomination in a civilized society. Oh right, we aren't civilized....

nothing like other people's problems

There really is nothing like other people's problems to make you realize you don't really have any. A friend is struggling with her teen. Mine just thanked me for cooking dinner, because he realized that "he never thanks me, and he really appreciates all the great food I make for him" WOW!!!

I am bummed by a long series of physical therapy I have to have for my neck/near frozen shoulder (which is causing my elbow issues). And then I talked to a friend at the office who is getting traction for her neck and back 4 times a week. Now I don't feel so bad.

Really and truly, it's all good.

this is f***ed

Okay, this news bit is just f***ed up. Seriously. 17 girls at Gloucester High School in Massachusetts are pregnant. All are under 16. And they got that way on purpose. Because, you know, like, they made a pact. And that's like a promise, you know.

And like they can't get in trouble if they all do it, right? I mean, like, how could their parents get ticked off, when it's not just one kid, but like, a whole group of kids.

Wonderful. Just wonderful. And the school nurses just resigned. Because they couldn't get permission to dispense birth control to anonymous students. You know, you would think they not only would have been given permission, they would have been applauded. Because clearly these kids not only need access to birth control, they need COMPULSORY birth control...

new threats to American safety

Beware -- our national security is once again threatened. In San Francisco, the state of California permitted a lesbian couple to get married, after only 55 years together(!) And in Vermont, people are swimming nekkid. In front of children.

Make no mistake, our values are being threatened, being undermined by the great liberal - press conspiracy. If we don't fight them, what will happen next?

Good lord, people might become tolerant, or even worse, accepting of the rights of others. We might decide marriage is a good thing, even between two queers. And our kids might find out what naked people look like. That'll turn 'em into perverts. And then they might grow up and marry a pig, or a dog, or something.

So be vigilant. Defend our right to be narrow-minded, prudish Americans.

we're all fine!

Just a follow-up, for those of you who expressed concern. We were touched by all the well-wishes, btw. We are all okay.

My sweet husband is bruised, but on the mend. Some of the stitches come out tomorrow night and the rest go away on their own. He has to go back for some more dental work, but the worst of that is over.

My nerve tests came out okay -- I have triceps tendonitis and golfer's elbow and the swelling was pressing on the nerve. I'm scheduled for some PT, but I should be fine.

Thanks again to everyone who called and emailed!

life interfering with my relaxation!!

Usually this is the time of year when I start to kick back and RELAX; enjoy the nice weather and more laid-back atmosphere.

Unfortunately, life is doing its best to keep things interesting. I am working half days this week to rest my elbow. More on that after my drs appt tonight. Our dear son is in the hectic last days of school, with ceremonies, half-day dismissals, parties and the like. So I am playing Chauffeur/Mom in a big big way.

And my husband did a face-plant off his bike last night. 2 hours in the ER, stitches, late night trip to the pharmacy. Today is the dentist and then new glasses (his got run over). He is miserable -- can't eat, can't get comfortable. I feel horrible for him. He is incredibly incredibly lucky though -- he wasn't wearing a helmet, and he landed on his mouth instead of his noggin.

I want a large lemonade and a damn hammock!!

finally!

OBAMA!!!

status update

I got a 96 on my paper and an A in my Art/Mythology course. I have no idea how. I thought the paper was awful, and was counting on my presentation grade to pull me to a B or C....

My elbow is ulnar nerve neuritis. I have to have nerve conduction tests on Wednesday. This is not good news, nor is it terrible. It just sorta exists in short-term suckage...

The Spud, our wonderful son, graduates from 8th grade on Thursday. On to HIGH SCHOOL!!!

The weather has been beautiful. The spouse has been wonderful. Life is good, despite the bumps.

good break, but no luck

The geekend went great. The Indy movie was okay, not great, but okay. Balticon was fun in a low-key kind of way. The days of staying up all night are long gone. I enjoyed the panels, the movies and anime I saw, and just hanging out with friends and family. As usually happens when I go to Cons, I now have a renewed desire to write. It usually fades pretty quickly.

Problem is, my elbow isn't much better, despite the rest. I went to the doctor yesterday, to get my referral, and am going to the orthopedist today. But I pretty much know the drill-- rest,and type less. Right now, while I am feeling the urge to write (which I can only accomplish by typing, no longhand for me), this is particularly frustrating. And of course, I have huge projects looming at work, and no end of keyboard time in my future.

Still, I loved the break.

taking a break, geekstyle

I took a few days off, to rest my RSI-riddled elbow and fingers. So I have 5 and a half straight days of leave. Tonight, it's dinner with friends, followed by Indiana Jones and the Crystal Skull. Tomorrow afternoon, we take off for Hunt Valley and Balticon 42. WHOOO-HOOOO! Total geekfest. I'm gonna just take it easy, try not to do much with the computer for 5 straight days. Oh, and our WII FIT arrived yesterday...so I might do some pseudo-exercise/game playing with that.

good luck senator!

Send some good thoughts Teddy Kennedy's way. He hasn't always been a good guy. But he has always been a truly great Senator. He has tirelessly fought for the poor, for the disabled, for equal rights for all, for protection for the disenfranchised. He is a true "liberal", and I think that's high praise.

I wish him all the best as he battles cancer.

gray gray day

It is raining in Maryland again. This is the soggiest May we've ever had. I think it's really affecting my mood. Normally, I am a glass half-full kind of person. I think things work out, generally. Today, I was bummed enough to start looking at my short-term disabilities benefits.

The thing is, I have an RSI -- tennis elbow caused by typing. I am sitting in my office with a heat wrap on my elbow. Two days ago I had x-rays taken of my right hand. I also had lots and lots of blood tests, to look for arthritis, lupus, etc. Pretty much everything checked out fine. But I wake up every morning with the fingers of my right hand swollen at the joint, and very very sore. Guess what? Another RSI... seems my tendons dislike typing. A LOT.

So my work is hurting me. It's not damaging me. Nothing like carpal tunnel, where the affects get worse and can become permanent. Nope, this is just pain. But it is discouraging. I should really take a few weeks off, and let everything rest. But I don't want to burn sick leave for what is basically an owie. Ditto with short-term disability. I'd rather not use it for something this minor.

It's a gray, gray day.

got my new toy

I got my new toy -- an Asus EEE PC. It's a fully-functioning laptop, running Linux. It weighs less than two pounds, cost less than $300, and is about the size of a paper-back book. It has built-in wifi and a very small qwerty keyboard. I got it for checking email, surfing the web and taking notes in class. It will also be my main travel PC.

I can't do programming on it. It really isn't suited to photoshop, typing for long stretches of time, or really serious work. So it's perfect.

http://event.asus.com/eeepc/microsites/en/index.htm

that after the deadline feeling

I turned my paper in on time, although it truly sucked. No amount of extra time would have improved it though -- I just don't do fact-based research papers very well. I like philosophy, literature, stuff where I can spin theories and prove my point.

Now that the paper is turned in, I have that feeling -- the after the deadline feeling. Depleted, aimless. I can't really seem to focus on anything, just want to drift in the sea of "done". Read some trash. Watch bad TV. Sit on the front porch and have a beer in the sunshine.

I guess its nature's way of forcing a re-charge. You just don't have the energy or the impulse to do anything for a while.

happy mother's day

To all the moms -- happy mother's day!

Being a mom is one of the two smartest things I ever did (and yes, the other one was marrying my hubby). Beats out going to college, getting into computers, absolutely everything.

It's funny -- I don't see myself as traditional, and I'm definitely no girly-girl -- but wife and mother are my top two.

same old song

I am still working on my paper on greek mythology. When I first started studying the myths, I thought the greek gods were outrageous in their misbehavior. Larger than life figures with larger than life failings.

I thought so, but recent news articles made me re-think that. Recently, an Austrian man was arrested for keeping his daughter imprisoned for over 15 years, and fathering six children by her. Persephone, maybe? Olympian incest?

A Baltimore teen was just convicted of raping and murdering his 4 year old cousin. Truly a headline plucked from Greek tragedy.

A polygamous sect was raided, in trouble for their practice of forcibly marrying off young girls to older men. Again, right at home in Athens, 500 BCE....

So do we ever progress? Are we stuck in the same place as our Greek and Roman forbears? Do we sing the same old song, over and over and over?

its term-paper time, again

It's term paper time again. My paper is due on the 12th, so to my way of thinking, I am a little ahead. I have started on my "works cited", I have read a stack of journal articles and skimmed a pile of books. Just finished Sophocles "Trachaia" and Euripides "Children of Herakles"... the Euripides was awful, but the Sophocles was fairly good. I also re-read Hesiod's Theogony. But things haven't really gelled yet.

I am writing about Herakles, not because I have a particular affinity, but because that's the slip I drew out of the envelope. I already did my oral presentation, which went fairly well. What we do with the subject is up to us. I am focusing on apotheosis, since it's a fascinating aspect of the myth.

Heracles is born of mortal mother (Alcmene) and an immortal father (Zeus). He lives his life as a mortal, albeit an extraordinary one. At the end of his life, when it is clear he is dying (accidentally and painfully poisoned by his wife), he has his own pyre built. He climbs in while still alive, and is burned alive. Zeus zaps the pyre with a thunderbolt, and the "mortal" part of Heracles is burned away. His mortal soul goes down to Hades, and his immortal self is swept away to Olympia, where he joins the host of Immortals.

He was worshipped by the Greeks as a hero, and as a diety, with separate shrines for both and separate forms of ritual for each of his roles.

My paper focuses on this transformation from man to god, after a horrible and painful death (sound like anything familiar?) and what purposes it served for the Greeks/what it said about them. Or it will focus on this, once I actually manage to get it all down on paper. Probably on the 11th, if I follow the usual pattern...

found a new acronym

I love this one -- HIPPO

an acronym for Highest Paid Person's Opinion... ie, I can't actually order this yet, I'm waiting for the HIPPO to decide

*snarf*

what do you think...

about what's going on in Texas at the FDLS compound? We have a duty as a society to protect children. And so part of me says, YAY for the authorities stepping in and doing something. But it also feels like religious persecution... these folks do not live like us. They believe things we don't. And it makes us uncomfortable.

But where do we draw the line? I'm an atheist, more or less. And many folks in this country feel that is not only wrong, but intolerable. Should I be arrested for depriving my child of the BIBLE? There are folks that would argue YES, that I am endangering his well-being, and his soul.

I don't happen to have a problem with polygamy. I don't think it really works well for most folks, and it certainly wouldn't work for me, but if all the parties are consenting adults, go for it.

I don't agree with the FDLS stance on husband's rights, either. But if the adult women, and the adult men agree that the husband is ruler; again, go for it. I don't have to live that way, so no skin off my nose.

The issue comes down to choices and freedom, and how much we allow. My gut says adults should have all the freedom they want, as long as it doesn't bump into anybody else's rights. And children have the right to be protected from wrong-headed adults, until they are old enough to make their own choices.

as a side note, and I mean way aside the freedom issues, does anybody but me wonder where the FDLS folks get the money to support all those kids, and do all that building???

never too old to rock, apparently

Apparently, you are never too old to rock. My family and I just attended a screening of Shine a Light, the Scorcese Rolling Stones concert documentary. WOW!! The guys in the band are all over 60 now. Mick is a dynamo on stage, un-freaking-believable in his energy and charisma. And for those who like Mick, yes, he is still HOT!!! Ron Wood was astounding on guitar. And Keith Richards, well, he has aged into a charming, charming, kick-ass rock-n-roller. Charlie Watts is solid and stolid on drums, just like always.

The show had a few guest performers -- Jack White, Christina Aguilerra and Buddy Guy. They were all terrific, and playing with the band seemed to energize them into better performances.

Scorcese did a great job of interspersing old interviews and media images of the band with the current concert footage. Age has not been physically kind to Mick or Keith, really; both look like they have had a hard hard road travel. But they have aged well. And they clearly still love what they do. You could tell how much they enjoy performing and being together on-stage. It's like they have found the fountain of youth -- and it's ROCK.

seen on the streets

a new business near work:

The Jesus Christ Bail Bond Company

I guess he's got to diversify, what with the economy and all ;-)

leave the olympics alone

OK. I think China has a terrible record for human rights. Of course, I don't think we've been stellar in recent years either. That said, the Olympics are a chance for the world to get together, not for politics, but for sport. The world needs more events like this, more opportunities to unite, to see what we have in common, not what separates us.

So let it alone. We can protest China's behavior another way. We can put political pressure to bear without touching the Olympics. Let the world athletes who have struggled and trained for this event have their chance to perform on a world stage.

now I know why we're called the middle class

How does it feel to be squeezed, stuck in the middle between a rock and a hard place? Gas is up. Oil is up. Healthcare is up. Groceries are up. Tuition is up. And our income, well it's up too, but not so much. I just got my annual review (outstanding in all categories!) and my raise. Which was the maximum allowed, at 2.5%. I have no complaints about my job. And no complaints about my general income. It's just that it seems I'm losing ground all the time.

I make more each year, but my expenses always increase at about 3 times the rate of my salary increases. And I'm one of the truly lucky ones. I get the max amount of raise every time. And because my base is so high, the percentage actually means I get a measurable increase.

What the hell would we do if we made the median income for Baltimore City for a family? Right now, that median income is somewhere around $39,000 a year. 2.5% of that is $975. At 24 pay periods a year, that comes to $40 a paycheck before taxes. That doesn't even cover a tank of gas every two weeks. How will people live? What the hell happens to the local economy if the largest employer in the state is handing out 2.5% raises, leaving the bulk of their employees poorer than the year before?

Most folks are not sitting on large saving accounts. If they are lucky they have a house, with a mortgage, and a car, with a loan. For the last few years, people counted on home equity to cover them in a pinch. Now it is possible that their house is worth less than they owe.

So, if good economic times "lift all boats" as the Republicans like to claim, what do bad times do? Are we all gonna sink together? I'm guessing that yachts have life rafts....

everything has a price

We have entered the Age of Whores. Everything has a price. The answer to almost any question that begins "for a million dollars, would you...?" is a resounding YES.

WTF??? How did we get to this?

Parents are letting their 6 year olds participate in Ultimate Fighting -- for money. Pimp out their 12 year old daughters to commercials and TV, for money. Let a camera follow them around, as they behave badly -- for money. Sell pictures they shouldn't have taken in the first place -- for money.

Where is the outrage? Why doesn't this piss us off? Why do we watch the shows (and yes, we do, in astounding numbers) and buy the products?

It's not a crisis in faith. That's crap. I have none, and I try to lead an ethical life. It's not a failure to spend time with our children. We spend more time with our kids now than any generation before us. And yet, we have become an unethical society. We have become a nation for sale.

How do we fix it?

still a slacker....

Last night, we were talking about our term-papers. I mentioned that I didn't have a topic yet, but that it was fine, because it's not due for weeks... Bad move. Apparently, I am still a slacker. I am still of the mindset where I think it's hugely impressive that I actually show up for class. And do the reading.

Sigh. Really, I'm just not a "true" scholar. I am interested in stuff. Lots of different stuff. And I like to read a lot. But I hate being forced to focus, and research, and write an ordered, logical paper. I can do it, but I put it off as long as possible. I get distracted by more interesting articles than the one I am currently reading, on un-related topics that suddenly become fascinating to me. I have been known to switch paper topics two or three times before I'm done, often after doing quite a bit of the legwork. To work on one idea for weeks is a huge strain. I don't know how anyone ever writes a thesis or a dissertation. You have to focus for months, for years on the same thing.

I am going to go email my professor and see if any of the grab-bag of ideas I've got will make an acceptable topic.

the results are in: my week at home

Tomorrow is the last day of my vacation. On the whole, I prefer travel vacations. It turns out that I am not the kind of person who can just let go and relax. I need to remove myself from the phone, the laptop, the chores, the daily routine, since I apparently can't ignore it all.

This is not to say the week was without its pleasures. Baltimore has great food, and we tried to eat all of it. This week we went out to eat at least once per day. We went to Los Amigos for Mexican food, to Salt for high-end cuisine. We went to Dogwood, where we combined good food with doing good (Dogwood trains ex addicts, the homeless, ex cons, so they can find employment in the food service industry). We ate at Austin Grill, at Na Do Ji, at the Towson Diner. Oh, and ate crabcakes at Faidley's in Lexington Market (and yes, they are as good as they say).

We also went out a bit. We saw the Map exhibit at the Walters Museum, along with spectacular photos from the Hubble space telescope. We visited Cylburn Arboretum and the National Arboretum (in DC). We spent Easter with my family and my mother-in-law.

I saw a few movies: a documentary on the Amish called Devil's Playground, a terrible chop socky movie called The Five Venoms. I am seeing American Gangster tonight.

I read a few books. I particulary enjoyed Bastard out of Carolina, and Aunt Dimity and the Next of Kin. Yes, they have absolutely nothing in common, except that I enjoyed them.

Other than that: I cleaned the oven. I cleaned the fridge. I did laundry. Took my son for haircut. Got my hair cut and dyed. Went to the eye doctor. Worked (yes, I know I shouldn't have, but I really had to). Went to class. Did homework. Grocery shopped. Took the dog for walks, and played ball in the backyard with him. Paid bills. Cleaned out the junk drawer.

So, would I do it again? Yeah, probably. But I still think it's more relaxing to go away. Still any vacation is better than NO vacation, know what I mean?

do I have to separate you two??

I emailed the Democratic National Committee yesterday. I asked them to use their influence with Obama and Clinton to get them to STOP bickering and focus on defeating the Republicans. The problem is that neither one of them is willing to forgo their personal ambitions in order to present a united front in the election.

We have two promising candidates, and we could still lose to McCain, because our candidates are too busy tearing each other down to notice the opposition. A political analyst I saw on TV yesterday said that Clinton's only chance at winning is to "win ugly". That she can only come out on top if she pulls every dirty trick out of the bag to throw at Obama. If she does this, by the time the general election comes around, no one will have the stomach to vote Democratic. People will either stay home, sick of the whole process, or vote McCain.

Either way, we will lose out.

ruminations

I went to the optician today. First time in ten years that I have had my eyes checked. Ten years ago, I had Lasik, correcting my life-long nearsightedness. Today, I discovered that one of my eyes is now near-sighted again, and one is far-sighted. This is why my drugstore reading glasses were giving me headaches... So, in ten days, I will have bifocals. Okay, nice modern bifocals with no tell-tale line through them... but bifocals.

Tomorrow, I go to the salon for a color touch-up and a haircut. My hair is mostly white now, so the color is being provided by modern chemistry.

I feel the same age I always have. I really do. But bifocals and hair color?? Time is definitely passing, whether I want to acknowledge it or not.

vacation -- at home

This is a huge first for me. At 1pm today, I am on vacation, until 3/31. At home. I have never taken more than a day of leave unless I was going away. Financially, it just didn't make sense to travel this time. I was really hoping for a week in London, but between the sky high air fares, and the execrable exchange rate, it was impossible. Hotels equivalent to a Holiday Inn ended up being over $400 a night in London when you factor in how many dollars to a british pound.

So, what am I going to do with my time? I hope to catch a few gallery exhibits (Maps at the Walters, and a photography exhibit at the BMA), maybe go to the comics museum. Our son wants to go to the DC Arboretum, a place we had a wonderful visit to a few years ago. I have to go to class on Monday night. I'm going to putter. Get my hair cut. Get my eyes checked. Read some stuff.

We'll see if I like this "at home" kind of vacation, and whether I find it as relaxing as getting away.

a somber anniversary

Yesterday marked the 5th anniversary of the war in Iraq.

In those five years:
4000 US soldiers have died
over 20,000 US soldiers have been wounded
over 85,000 Iraqis have died
we have spent over $587 billion dollars on the war
the Iraqis have gone from 24 hours of electricity per day to less than 7 hours
we have destroyed countless schools, churches, temples, businesses, streets, bridges, marketplaces

Worth it? not by an kind of calculation known to mankind.

And so, I send a prayer for the dead and damaged. And a hope, however slim, that we learn something in this, and never ever repeat the mistake.

the "asking for it" defense

I am a little peeved. Okay, pissed, pissed, pissed. We just had a large juvenile trial here in Baltimore. A group of young teens was accused of dragging a woman and her boyfriend off of a city bus and beating the woman severely. A key to the defense was that the teens were black and the woman and her boyfriend were white. The defense argued that the boyfriend used the "N" word, and that the woman spit on the teens. And so they were "asking for it".

I am no legal scholar, but I believe there is not an "asking for it" rule. If you beat someone bloody, break bones in their face, it isn't okay because they were rude to you. Or nasty to you. If you were beaten first, if you were threatened with a weapon, you may defend yourself to the best of your ability.

But you don't get permission to severely assault someone who calls you a name, even an ugly name. And last time I checked, spit was NOT considered deadly force.

Not one defense lawyer, mind you, but five of them, came up with this strategy. They were not arguing mitigating circumstances. They weren't trying for a reduced penalty. They were arguing for "not guilty by reason of they was asking for it".

Now, the actual facts were in dispute. Maybe the woman did call them names. Maybe she didn't. Maybe she did spit on them. If she did, that would be very very wrong. And stupid, to boot. But in no way does that permit a group of children to drag her off a public bus and kick the living sh*t out of her.

The judge found the teens "involved", the juvenile equivalent of guilty. All the defense attorneys said they would appeal the decision.

What kind of message does this type of defense send to teens? They could have killed this woman, and apparently would have, if a bystander had not intervened. Asked if he felt bad for putting the woman in the hospital, one of the teens said "no. I don't feel nothin'"

I am afraid that's the truth.

life in the mom lane

I had an unusual experience on Saturday night. At 11:15pm, my son and I got in the car and drove to the local Gamestop. To stand in line. For a game. A pre-ordered game. Smash Brothers Brawl, for those of you who follow such things.

The store was full of boys and young men. There were 4 women: me, 2 other moms, and a girl who works at the store. There was one gamer girl, and one girl who came with her boyfriend and looked pissed as all get out about it.

There was a tournament going on to keep the kids occupied while waiting. My son did not participate, but clearly enjoyed watching and cheering and jeering. The tournament was won by a 9 year old kid, who beat several twenty year olds on his way to victory. There was a lot of smack talk. Lots of "you play like a chick" -- which produced outrage from the girl gamer who works there. Lots of free-floating testosterone and just general guy-ness....

There were punks (no really -- green mohawks, piercings, lipstick and eyeliner), jocks, skaterboyz, kids as little as six or seven, and a few sheepish looking grown men in the 30-40 year old range.

Every single one of them had pre-ordered the game. At the stroke of midnight, the cash registers started ringing. Each gamer went up to the register, produced their receipt, paid their balance and left with the game. The crowd was halved within 15 minutes.

Now, each one of those kids could have come in the next day and picked up their game. They probably would not have had to wait in line. And they were guaranteed the game if they picked it up within 3 days. But they all HAD TO BE THERE. They had to pick up that game the second they could.

Our son stayed up until 6am playing his new game. And said it was worth every second of waiting in the store.

And by the way, THANKS MOM!
so that is why I was at a game store instead of home in bed... for the thanks, and the grin that only a deliriously happy thirteen year old can produce.

Client 9

Oh, Eliot -- how could you? Eliot Spitzer, Mr. Clean, was a repeated client of a prostitution ring targeted by the FBI. Caught with his metaphorical pants down, his wife suffers, his kids suffer, and the state of New York likely loses its governor.

What was this guy thinking? He has made a slew of well-connected enemies over the years. He is a well-known public figure. Did he think that because he got an adjoining room in a hotel, and had the prostitute travel from New York to DC for his appointment, that no one would notice? Apparently, he thought the $4300 a night he paid would guarantee secrecy. What it mostly guaranteed is that he is an idiot.

What a disappointment! Another "champion of justice" topples over....

taking time out to hang out

This weekend was a wonderful reminder that it is important to take time out to just hang out. In the day to day grind, it is easy to lose track of yourself. You get immersed in the tasks at hand, focused on the next thing on the list.

On Friday, we got together for dinner with the parents of our son's two best friends. Over the last couple of years, we have become good friends in our own right. We ordered pizzas, cracked open a few bottles of wine, and just kicked back and relaxed. It was brief -- the boys were volunteering at the Ronald McDonald House and finished up earlier than expected. We had to all cut our evening short to go pick up the kids. But the time we did get was great.

On Saturday night, I went out with the Orkney Road Girls, a small group of women who all live on Orkney Road. We get together sporadically, a few times a year, for food and conversation. There is something comforting and relaxing in the company of other women. This is a late realization in my life. I always believed I really didn't like women all that much, and preferred to hang with the guys. I have a few close women friends that I treasure, but I always figured they were exceptions to the rule.

I have to make more time for this, and less time for stress and chores and work.

Gary Gygax, RIP

A big GEEK salute to Gary Gygax, who passed away yesterday. For those who aren't big ol' geeks, Gary Gygax was one of the creators of Dungeons and Dragons. While few adults play the original game anymore, many of us spent more hours of our adolescence and young adulthood than we would care to count playing D&D or one of its off-shoots.

We had a great time. And we made enduring friendships. We exercised our imaginations, extended our vocabularies, and occasionally learned stuff.

What more can you ask from a game?

a little sunlight and everything is better

I just took my lunchtime walk. I walked in bright sunshine. I felt 10 pounds lighter (I'm not) and ten years younger (ditto!). Monument Street is grubbily charming in the sunlight. People were everywhere. Walking, smiling, laughing, smoking, lunching, rushing. But out there in the bright light of day.

Joyous!

the universe has spoken

The universe has spoken. Our son did not get into Park School. He is fine, more than fine, with the news. He is happy where he is, and is happy to be staying with his friends at Baltimore Lab. He was a little put out, initially, but this was more from the blow to his ego than from the actual result.

I think my husband and I are having a harder time with it. We wanted that kind of experience for our son, and we wanted him to have those opportunities. I think we also wanted some tangible proof of his progress. Had he gotten in, we could have pointed to that and said "look how far he's come". He really has come so far, and accomplished so much more than we had hoped. But we have to trust our judgement on that, and not some outside third party, and we of course, are biased.

I think that we will look back on this and think it was a good thing. I think he's not done learning what Lab needs to teach him.

Still, its hard to take when someone rejects your child.

and we're worried about baseball?

A new study, released yesterday, indicates that 1%, yes 1%, of our adult population is in jail or prison. This is alarming. We spend more to incarcerate adults than we do to educate our children.

And what is Congress doing? Holding interminable hearings about baseball. I don't even know why this is Congress' business. Baseball should be policing baseball. If the sport is tainted by the use of steroids and HGH, ban players that test positive. Or come up with some policy to deal with the issue.

I think Congress could better spend its time looking at why so much of our population is in jail. Why is drug use and drug crime so high in the general population? Much more of a question than whether one dumb-ass pitcher lied to Congress. The great game of baseball is just that -- a game.

How about spending our tax dollars wisely, looking at issues that affect our lives?