this makes no sense

Two interesting stats the day after Thanksgiving -- 40% of all food purchased in America is thrown away, and 1 in 6 Americans does not get enough to eat. It seems to me we need to find a way to reduce the waste, or channel it to the people who need it. Maybe buy less, or buy the same amount, but put some aside for the food bank. Invite someone struggling to make ends meet to a meal.

I don't know what the answer is, I really don't. I do know it bothers me to think that in a country of such overwhelming abundance and wealth, people are going hungry.

wii not so fit

I've been walking every day in my struggle to be more fit and to lose weight. But I've been fighting against both genetics and time,in the form of family history and age, so it hasn't been working so well.

In response, I decided that I would "rent" our son's WII for a month, and see if I could use it to jumpstart an exercise program, and to see if I would use it enough to merit buying one. I am using Wii FIT and Wii SPORT, to start with.

This is the first time in ages that I have enjoyed exercising. The boxing, bowling and tennis games on Wii SPORT are addictive. I didn't like the golf, found it frustrating because I am so bad at it, but I worked up a sweat and was sore the next day after 15 minutes of tennis and boxing.

Wii FIT is harder for me, because well, I really am not fit. I am doing a few of the yoga poses (badly), some strength training, some aerobic exercise, and some balance games. I hate the strength training, like the yoga poses I can do (very few so far), and am having fun with the aerobic exercises. Jogging in place is just so much more entertaining when you are chasing someone on screen. And the hula hoop game is fun, gets me out of breath, and would make my neighbors fall over laughing if they peeked in my windows while I was doing it.

Is all this fun working? I am back to losing a pound or so a week; I can already see a difference in my leg strenghth and tummy muscle (no one else would notice, but I did). The exercise time passes quickly, and I actually run out of steam before I get bored. My guess is it will only take me so far, but since I have such a huge way to go, that will be a long long time from now.

stress challenge is really a sleep challenge

So, I am participating in this "stress challenge" this month at work. I basically track 4 things each day: nutrition, physical activity, sleep and relaxation. I get 1 point for eating either a target amount for fruit and vegetables, or for eating a whole grain breakfast, then 1 get a point for getting 8 hours sleep, 1 point for taking 10 minutes of relaxation time and 1 point for exercising 20 minutes. I have had only 3 four point days since November 1. Guess why? Nope. Not exercise. It's sleep, and I'm not getting much.

I've been doing a little research. It turns out most women in their mid-40s don't sleep well or enough. Most - not a small percentage, not half, MOST. This is crazy. That's a whole big group of cranky women sleep-walking through life. The reason -- stress, hormones, multi-tasking, basically our entire lives are conspiring to see we don't get a good night's sleep. Maybe it's nature's way of killing us off now that we have served our biological imperative. Maybe it's a joke. I don't know.

My doctor says that hormones are mostly responsible, but hey, this phase only lasts 6-7 YEARS and then I'll be good as new...

simple kindness

It's not hard. Hold the door open for someone carrying a load of stuff. Smile at the people you pass. Say good morning. Say good night. Compliment someone, sincerely. Say please. Say thank you. Send someone a note, or a card. Tell someone you appreciate them.

It doesn't take much. I think we're all just out of practice. I think that every small gesture returns to you ten fold. Maybe you will make someone's day.

things you have to teach your sons

Today's news carried the story of a fifteen year old girl. She was raped by multiple teenagers outside a school dance. Multiple others stood by and did nothing while she was raped.

As the mother of a teen-aged boy, I know I have certain lessons to impart. I have had the "don't smoke" discussion. I have had the "don't drink if your under-aged, don't drink and drive, drinking impairs your judgment" talk. I have even had the "if you are going to have sex, wear a condom" discussion, even though he isn't even dating anyone right now. I'm saving the "don't sleep with someone you don't want to wake up with" for a later discussion. We have discussed the whole breaking the law thing as well -- you can choose to break the law, but if you do, you have also chosen to take the consequences.

Now I have to add a whole new subject for discussion. Don't participate in gang rape, and don't stand by while others do. Really. Get out, call the police. I never thought that would be something I would need to discuss, but I guess I do.

Because I am guessing that there are some surprised parents out in California today, ones who thought their boys would never be involved in something like that, and never thought their child would stand on the sidelines and cheer while others raped a girl outside a school dance.

Pennies on the Dollar

Today was our annual United Way Campaign kickoff breakfast. As always, it had me thinking about people who need help.

Almost all of us would jump at a deal that lets us pay pennies on the dollar to buy something. If it cost a dollar, and I could buy it for a penny, I would. So would you. Now turn it around -- would you give a penny on a dollar? If you had a dollar, and someone really really needed it, would you give them a penny? How about if you had ten dollars, would you help someone out with a buck? I think most people would say "Yes" to that.

So this is my challenge to all of you. 1%. Pennies on a dollar. If everyone would dig deep, and give a whopping 1% of what they earn, we could make a huge collective impact on hunger, on homelessness, on poverty. That's a fabulous return, for pennies on a dollar.

blog action day -- climate change

Today is Blog Action Day, which means a topical post on climate change. Except I really have not that much to say.

Climate change is real. It is not a political invention of the left. It is not caused primarily by cows. It is not a natural phenomenon. It is a problem that man has created, with our great big brains, and our thirst for more of everything, and easier everything. And so we have cars, even for an errand around the block. And we have air conditioning, even when it's 70 degrees. We have microwaves because 10 minutes is too long to wait for food. We have huge houses to accomodate all our stuff. We crave fruit that doesn't grow in this hemisphere, so we ship it halfway around the world. We have short attention spans, so we have TVs, and stereos and computers and ipods and xboxes and a whole host of things to distract us.

If we each made a small change or two, if each and every single person, did one or two small things to reduce what we use, what we buy, how we get to places, we can make a dent in the problem. It's important. And it's urgent. So do something today.

seeing each other as cut-outs

When did we stop seeing other people as "people"? three teens in florida lit another teen on fire, as retaliation for preventing them from stealing a bicycle. repeat, a bicycle. A six year old is about to get sent to reform school, for bringing a camping fork/spoon/knife combination to school to eat his lunch. A six year old! Certain pundits cheered when the city of chicago lost its bid for the Olympics, because Obama lobbied for chicago to win. An American city lost out on an opportunity, and people cheered the loss. WTF???

We apparently see each other as cardboard cut-outs. It's the only explanation that I can see. Maybe there are too many of us. Beyond a certain number in a given space, we just can't see anymore. I don't know.

It scares me. How do we get back to seeing each other, really seeing each other, as people? With hopes, dreams, feelings, real people. It's important.

the new semester

The new semester has begun. I am taking just one class - From Jerusalem to Graceland. We are looking at sainthood, beginning with the byzantine saints, pilgrimages, relics, and ending with Elvis Presley and Graceland. It's thought-provoking, interesting,and just a heck of a lot of fun. Our class meets in what was the Walters family home, and is now the administrative offices of the Walters Museum. We meet in the parlor, complete with high ceilings, period furniture (except for our conference table), paintings, etc. It's definitely a treat.

I am already feeling pulled in too many directions, with too many time commitments. It
s not just a new semester for me. Work is heating up as we enter one of our two really busy periods. And our son has the busy schedule of a 10th grader. He can't drive yet, so I spend a lot of time schlepping him back and forth.

I have to admit that I love it though, even when it wears me out.

the lessons of sept 11

The lessons of Sept 11th are not that we should fear terrorism, or that we should give up freedoms for security. The lessons of Sept 11th are that we should help where we can, never take our loved ones for granted, appreciate our gifts and our freedoms, and live every day as if it were our last.

The people who went to work in the Towers that morning thought they would come home that evening. Many of them probably bolted through their morning routines. They might have remembered to kiss the spouse and kids, but they might not. If they could have chosen where to spend their last breaths, I doubt many would have chosen the office.

The firefighters, the police officers, the everyday folks who pitched in and helped, who ran toward danger rather than away from it, were showing us the way. That we give of ourselves, as much as we can, to help others.

Terrorism can strike anywhere, even the heart of New York City. America is not immune. But you can't protect against a truly determined killer willing to sacrifice himself; all we can do is try to get at the root cause, and not make more terrorists.

a national disgrace

OK -- I get it. People are sharply divided on issues these days. But really, people! The last week has been a national disgrace. Our President, our democratically elected leader, wanted to encourage the nation's students. So he planned a speech. And the floodgates opened. Talk radio hosts encouraged people to keep their children home from school, so as not to be "indoctrinated" by the President. Parents protested. Schools decided not to air the speech, because of parental pressure.

The speech was not political. It was in keeping with Obama's role as president -- to lead the nation. He didn't say a single controversial thing -- unless you think encouraging children to study is controversial. His purpose was to encourage children to stay in school, to study, to make something of themselves, to take advantage of the educational opportunities afforded them. What a rebel!

You can disagree with the President. You can dislike the person who was elected. But the OFFICE OF THE PRESIDENT deserves respect. You can teach your children an invaluable lesson if you can teach them the distinction between the man and the office. This is a democracy. That almost always means that some people did not get their choice in elected officials. But it only works as a form of government if the roles are respected. I couldn't stand George Bush. I did not respect the man at all. But I respect democracy, and I respect the office. That's what we are supposed to do, and that's what we are supposed to model for our children.

Honestly, we can do better than this!

small changes

Sometimes, it's the small changes that really amount to something.

This morning, my fifteen year old son brushed his teeth without prompting. Then he packed a salad, A SALAD, for his lunch. I felt like I had won something. I'm not sure what, but I felt VICTORIOUS.

Today at lunch, I walked a quick mile, instead of web surfing. I got outside, felt the sun on my skin, enjoyed the cool spots of shade. Not a huge deal, not a real long walk, but I got moving.

Little things. Nothing earth shaking. But small changes add up. They really do.

mourning Ted Kennedy

Ted Kennedy passed away today. Often, he is described as JFK's brother, or Bobby Kennedy's brother. He was so much more. It diminishes him, I think, to label him this way, as if his importance is as a small piece of Camelot, rather than a person in his own right. Ted Kennedy was a Senator for 47 years. He was a champion of the poor, the powerless, the voiceless.

He made horrible mistakes in his life. He faced tremendous adversity and personal loss. Yet he persevered, when others would have faltered. He could have lived on his fame and power and money, and never contributed anything to anyone. No one would have blamed him for retiring from public life when Bobby died. But he didn't. He truly believed that "from whom much is given, much is expected".

He was so much more than "the last Kennedy brother". He was the Lion of the Senate, and he will be missed.

I can feel Fall

I can feel Fall. This morning, I woke up and it was cold. We had left the AC unit on all night, and the temps outside had dropped. It was actually pleasant outside, after a couple of sweltering, humid weeks. When I walked from the parking garage to my office, I actually wished for a moment that I had a light jacket.

Fall is coming.

Our son goes back to school on Wednesday. We've bought school supplies, a new lunch bag, school shoes.

Fall is coming.

I bought a new notebook for me for school. Don't need one, just love new notebooks. Work is getting busier. It's getting darker in the morning when I wake up.

Fall is coming.

Happy 27th!

Today is our 27th wedding anniversary. I still think it's one of the smartest things I ever did. And I would do it again, if I had to do it all over again.

My personal wish today is for another 27 wonderful years. My wish for everyone else is that they get to enjoy the same happiness that we do.

what I learned on my summer vacation

in no particular order, here's what I learned on my summer vacation:

• your kid can surprise you, in a good way
  
• any day that starts with a cup of tea, sitting on a dock looking over the water will be good
  
• to be really at peace, I need to be near water
  
• you can have too much fried food
  
• mcdonalds is even worse than I remember
  
• a few hours with a good friend can restore your spirit
  
• america is a truly beautiful country
  
• michigan may be one of the prettiest places I've ever been
  
• traverse city is a nice place to visit, but it is kind of stepford
  
• fresh raspberry blueberry cobbler is amazingly good
  
• summer at 73 degrees is very different from summer at 92 degrees
  
• we are spoiled by how nice people are in Baltimore
  
• don't underestimate the power of a really good armchair
  
• naps are essential
  
• there is a huge difference between hiking 5 miles in the woods, and walking 5 miles on pavement
  
• there is no sound like the laughter of a two year old
  
• sandwiches are under-rated
  
• the cleveland zoo is better than the baltimore zoo
  
• I want to come back as a sea otter
  
• I am not addicted to my computer -- no problem giving it up for a few days
  
• you can go out to eat too much
  
• it was easier to drive 500 miles when I was 20
  
• I need to take more vacations
  
  

would you sell your kidney for...

A rabbi was recently arrested as part of the huge NJ corruption case. He is charged with trying to broker the sale of human kidneys. For $160,000. Which got me thinking -- would I sell my kidney to someone who needed it, for $160,000? A woman at Johns Hopkins, Pamela Paulk, recently donated her kidney in a 16 way donor swap. Her kidney went to a complete stranger, so that a friend of hers at Hopkins could get a kidney from someone else who was a better match.

I thought recently about doing the same thing as Pamela. As soon as my son is out of the house, I thought, I would volunteer to donate a kidney. But I soon chickened out, mentally--since I hadn't actually committed to anything, except in my mind. But now, sad to say, I got to thinking again. For $160,000, yeah, I think I would give up a kidney. I mean, I was going to just give one away. Why not help someone and profit at the same time?

Like I said, it's sad to say.

47!

I am 47 today. I had a great birthday. Lots of sweet birthday wishes. A nice dinner with my husband and son. Got a couple of books as presents that I have been dying to read. Signed up for a half-marathon with a friend. We are going to walk it, not run it, but we have to finish in 5 hours.

My brother arrives tonight, so I will get to see him this weekend.

Life is full, and life is good!

15!

Fifteen years ago, I gave birth to a baby boy. 7 pounds 15 ounces, 21 inches long, if you care about such stuff. He had all the requisite fingers and toes, and we thought he was amazing. Fifteen years later, we still think he's amazing.

I am grateful that he's our son, and I am joyful at the prospect of what the next fifteen years might bring.

Happy birthday, baby boy!

ocean city

I used to go to Ocean City for a week every summer when I was a kid. We didn't actually stay IN Ocean City most of the time; we usually stayed in a campground outside of Berlin/Snow Hill. But we would hang out on the beach near 1st Street. We would fish off the getty there. And we would spend one day on the Boardwalk, eating Thrasher's Fries, playing Skeeball, riding the rides, playing the games. Mom would spend the whole day in the Bingo hall (don't know if it's still there).

Ocean City then was crowded. The people were invariably white, and blue collar below 50th Street or so, and white and white collar north of 50th. Traffic was crazy, and it was very difficult to walk around.

I just spent a few days around the 4th of July at the Carousel on 117th Street. Oddly, even with the holiday, Ocean City was less crowded than when I was a kid. They have made improvements in the flow of traffic, and in the local bus system. It was pretty easy to cross Ocean Blvd, even at high noon.

The people were the biggest change. Ocean City has discovered diversity, finally. For the first time, I heard people speaking foreign languages. I saw people of every ethnic background, skins of every hue. It was great. Northern OC is no longer the province of the wealthier summer visitors.

There has been some attempt made to plant some grasses, and to clean the beach. The sand is weird, too soft to be "natural" if that makes any sense. Basically when you walk on the beach, you sink into the sand. I think it's because the sand is carted in, and cleaned by machine daily. It looks great, but isn't the beach sand you find in Ocean City New Jersey, or the Outer Banks.

I enjoyed the visit. I might even go back.