I have 35 days until we leave for a family vacation. I am actually counting down the days. Once again, I have let myself get depleted and exhausted to the point that my vacation becomes my light at the end of the tunnel -- the only way I keep moving.
This year is very different. We are going on a family vacation, just my husband, son and I. We have rented a beautiful cabin [indoor jacuzzi, hottub, pool table, plasma tv, granite counter kitchen, so cabin seems a misnomer], in the Smokey Mountains. So, in an improbably turn of events, we are heading to Tennessee for vacation. Specifically Gatlinburg. I intend to read, rest, read, rest, eat a ton, get lots of fresh air and exercise, spend lots of time canoodling, and get to know my kid better while he still talks to me.
I also hope to figure out why I keep repeating the same old work patterns. I find a job that suits me. I settle in and proceed to turn it into a larger and larger job until it becomes more than one person can handle. I start out being useful, and end up indispensable, in a really not good sort of way. In that "I don't know how we will get through a week without you here" kind of way. The stress becomes too much, and then I start looking for another job. Then I repeat the whole damn cycle again. And again. I really think I need to figure this out, or end up repeating it forever.